Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Unbroken


(This piece by the author, a part-time writer and whose essays have appeared in the Philippine Star, The Philippine Daily Inquirer and the Manila Bulletin, was written a year ago. He found it in his compilations and decided to put it in his blog.)
Movies dealing with the sporadically talked-about subject of homosexuality are getting more numerous: “Ang Pagdadalaga ni (The Blossoming of) Maximo Oliveros,” “Beautiful Boxer,” “Brokeback Mountain.” I have seen them all.
These movies are all multi-awarded and, based on news reports, are making good money at the box-office.
By all accounts, this development seems to augur positively for a highly discriminated segment of the population (the LGBTs) since a more expansive group of audience are learning to appreciate and look into their lives and stories.
Having watched all those movies, I still haven’t come to the conclusion that gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgenders are already accepted with open arms in society; tolerated, yes but accepted, not yet. They still would have a long way to go before they could ostentatiously wave their boa feathers.
Instead, my epiphany is that all these films about the third sex would seem to be a higher manifestation of how many people and society traditionally view people of the third gender; that is, for “entertainment value.”
This manifestation could be summed up by a Woody Allen line. When Allen was asked what fame had brought him, his retort was: “I get to be rejected by a higher class of women. Just the same with these gay movies, the “for entertainment value” is still there, but only in a more sophisticated way.
Whereas before pedestrians would ogle at transgenders and transsexuals catwalking in the streets and be amused in the process, they (the pedestrians) need not go out in the streets to see these human spectacles. They could now see these very same people in CDs and DVDs. Whereas gay beauty contests used to amuse a majority of the population, the latter could now also go to the movies and be amused and fascinated but not necessarily be changed in terms of shaking off their prejudices and bigotry.
I had a first-hand experience of the above assertion (that is, that the films dealing on homosexuality are still “for entertainment”) while watching “Brokeback Mountain” at a theater. In those particularly squeamish scenes where the two protagonists had anal sex, viewers at my back and front would either giggle or hoot. In one particular scene where the two protagonists kiss each other hungrily, a woman in the audience shouted “Yikes!” while the rest of the audience reacted in laughter.
Even Hollywood, after the 78th Oscars, was not above the suspicion of homophobia when it awarded the Best Director trophy to Ang Lee but rejected his movie for the Best Picture plum. Talk about approving of the creator but not his work or creation.
Of course, no one should fault these filmmakers who tackle gay themes. At least they made this once-taboo subject fodder for discussion, whether intellectual or otherwise.
But unless the movies are specifically aimed at promoting acceptance of the third sex and not just to chronicle their lives or to tell their stories, the GLBTs would still be occasionally viewed for their “entertainment value,” to amuse and fascinate. Unless and until there would be a paradigm-shift in the majority of the population, the third sex would still continue to experience bigotry, marginalization, and discrimination. Most importantly, unless and until there are laws (such as HB 643, the Anti-Discrimination Law) and a system in place to protect them, people of the third sex would still have a long, long way to go in terms of being totally accepted in society.
All this is not so gloomy though. At least, something has got to start somewhere. 


 


Tuesday, November 20, 2007

AGORAPHOBIA

A lesson in etymology:agoraphobia is literally defined as the fear of open spaces. Clinical psychologists,however, have extended this term to mean the fear of coming out from one's comfort zone. (I've learned this expanded definition while viewing the Ellen Degeneres Show one day.)
I think I have agoraphobia---perhaps a mild form of it. You see, I have been quite afraid to venture out of my comfort zone lately. I am not just referring to my physical comfort zone but to my mental/psychological and emotional comfort zone as well. Truth to tell, we all have comfort zones. I sure do have mine. For somebody who has faced so much rejection (whether real or imaginary) almost his entire life, i have developed a built-in system where i feel most secure and to a certain extent invincible.
Psychologically, I feel invincible when I am talking about academic stuff. This extends to my being in the company of nerds, geeks, bookworms and people who gets their self-worth from being mental. I seldom want to be in the company of other types of people. The rare times I had been comfortable with non-mental types are when I know for sure that I am intellectually and academically superior to them and they know that I am that. This means the company of old friends, acquaintances, and former classmates who have longed acknowledged my superiority in that aspect (the mental aspect, that is).
Physically-speaking, I am comfortable inside the classroom, in my room and in our house. I am a homebody. I hate travelling, that's a no-brainer. I also hate going to various places or transferring from one place to another. There are people who can't stay on one place; I am the exact opposite. I am happy staying in one location unless I go to specifically hop from one place to another such as bar hopping, etc.
Emotionally, I seldom acknowledge my true emotions. Acknowledging my real emotions seems so painful to me. I fear the epiphany that comes with being true to my emotions. What I'm good at rationalizing. I've heard somewhere that rationalizing has something to do with one's ego. The bigger the ego, the more a person is prone to rationalize. It has something to do with grandiosity:the presumptuous feeling that something could not happen to me because I am above it; or that what happens to the other person could not happen to me because I am special or different or both.
I am glad that I am acknowledging this fear of coming out of my comfort zone. It is the beginning of wisdom. But I still don't know what to do about it, or how to go about it, or much more important, how to cure it.
Hmmm, drugs kaya. I mean, medication. I have read of a drug which cures the blues. This drug gives an effect of lifting the moods. But I doubt if it is available in the Philippines. I have read about it in an Australian magazine. Anyway, I'll research about. And I'll find substitutes if there are.
For now I am banking on prayer, meditation and a little bit of Yoga. Among these, I believe prayer is the best drug there is.Being addicted to God is not such a bad thing. Not bad at all.

Agoraphobic celebrities

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Sharonian

I don't know about YU (hint!), er, you, but me I am a Sharonian!
Nooooooh, I don't mean that kind of Sharonian. I could care less about local showbiz lest i'll be called cheapangga. I really don't give a frigging hoot about local showbiz. Hollywood, yes; local showbiz, no. . . .
Anyway, what I mean about Sharonian: i am one of Sharon's fans, or more appropriately, friend! And I am quite proud to say that.
The Sharon I'm referring to ladies and gents is not Kiko's consort and KC's mom but my high school friend Sharon.
Through the years I have learned to appreciate Sharon's friendship. Not that i am this cold-blooded, full-blooded SOB, although I concede to being a bitchy, naughty, yet brainy me (ehem!). You see, although I am quite adept at the academics department, I am a total moron when it comes to the relational department. Truth to tell, I tend to leave friendship and friends by the wayside. Hell, I DO tend to take people for granted.
But my friend Sharon has been a good friend since way back when. She is this unobtrusive friend, a shadow in the background yet her presence as a friend is both felt and appreciated. She has this amazing talent of being always there for YU(hint again!), er, you yet does not take the spotlight from you. Neither does she a straight-in-your face friend who wants to be recognized for every good deed she does . She does her stuff, as any good friend does, but lets you be.
I have been a blessed recipient to many of Sharon's goodness and kindness, and I would be really hard pressed to repay them all (So help me God!). There was this one time when i was at one of the darkest and lowest moments in my life, and she gave me a gift which really helped me see myself through that lousy period. (Sharon knows this! If any reader is clueless, go read Sharon's blog.) I was so touched by her gesture. (Thanks again, Sha!) There are many, many more such similar acts which have again and again made me realized how good and wonderful a friend Sharon is. I hope my friendship with Sharon gets stronger through the years.
Truly, I'm a Sharonian. And that's no mere showbiz tsika. 

Sharon Cuneta.com